Her own bewilderment and surprise were overlaid by shock: he was going to cry。
She had seen him cry before; but never since he stopped drinking 。。。 and never
in those days unless he was very drunk and pathetically remorseful。 He was a
tight man; drum…tight; and his loss of control frightened her all over again。
He came toward her; the tears brimming over his lower lids now; his head
shaking involuntarily as if in a fruitless effort to ward off this emotional
storm; and his chest drew in a convulsive gasp that was expelled in a huge;
racking sob。 His feet; clad in Hush Puppies; stumbled over the wreck of the
radio and he almost fell into her arms; making her stagger back with his weight。
His breath blew into her face and there was no smell of liquor on it。 Of course
not; there was no liquor up here。
〃Whats wrong?〃 She held him as best she could。 〃Jack; what is it?〃
But he could do nothing at first but sob; clinging to her; almost crushing the
wind from her; his head turning on her shoulder in that helpless; shaking;
warding…off gesture。 His sobs were heavy and fierce。 He was shuddering all over;
his muscles jerking beneath his plaid shirt and jeans。
〃Jack? What? Tell me whats wrong!〃
At last the sobs began to change themselves into words; most of them
incoherent at first; but ing clearer as his tears began to spend themselves。
〃。。。 dream; I guess it was a dream; but it was so real; I。。。
it was my mother saying that Daddy was going to be on the radio and I 。。。
he was 。。。 he was telling me to 。。。 I dont know; he was yelling at me 。。。
and so I broke the radio 。。。 to shut him up。 To shut him up。 Hes dead。 I
dont even want to dream about him。 Hes dead。 My God; Wendy; my God。 I never
had a nightmare like that。 I never want to have another one。 Christ! It was
awful。〃
〃You just fell asleep in the office?〃
〃No 。。。 not here。 Downstairs。〃 He was straightening a little now; his weight
ing off her; and the steady back…and…forth motion of his head first slowed and
then stopped。
〃I was looking through those old papers。 Sitting on a chair I set up down
there。 Milk receipts。 Dull stuff。 And I guess I just drowsed off。 Thats when I
started to dream。 I must have sleepwalked up here。〃 He essayed a shaky little
laugh against her neck。 〃Another first。〃
〃Where is Danny; Jack?〃
〃I dont know。 Isnt he with you?〃
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